GenX and Church Community

My wife and I had a really good conversation the other night. Well, maybe it was more of a series of questions than anything else. We questioned the purpose and place of worship within different generational cohorts (i.e. baby boomers, GenXers, etc.) and how multiple generations, with diverse tastes, concerns, and ways of speaking and living their faith, can coexist within a church. Basically, we came to the agreement that it is horribly messy, it is inescapably painful, and it is absolutely necessary. We have so much to learn from one another.
I was struck by the GenX video presented in class. I was amazed at how clearly it articulated many of the feelings that I have in approaching the Church. It captured a lot of the longing to be heard that I see in my clients and I can’t help but wonder what level of impact would take place if we, as the Church, could spare some moments to listen to our culture and understand them without needing to form a response. Listening for the sake of listening is immensely powerful. It is also an essential ingredient of relationship, and if we are truly about relationships within the Body, then I think we need to check our current recipe and make certain that we have added enough undiluted listening to the mix.
During undergrad, I worked at Starbucks Coffee and was introduced not only to the ins-and-outs of making a mean latte, but also the degree of attention that goes into creating a “third place,” an environment in which individuals can meet, discuss the issues of the day, and feel as if they are at home without being at home. It comes to no surprise to me that in many ways I feel more at home within a coffee house that seeks to provide a place where I can both relax AND engage and I can talk about whatever seems pressing at the time. In many ways, I’ve found that it is easier to talk about God within my local coffee house than it is to speak openly about God within the sanctuary. This leads me to ask why this is the case, and to question whether it is unavoidable.
Within my current church, there are about five younger couples that try to get together for lunch after our church service each Sunday. We talk about life, plans for the future, the day’s message, joys, sorrows, and in many ways, I feel as if this is the church that sustains me most. I have no intention of pulling away from my larger church congregation. What I am highlighting and questioning is whether or not these experiences which have been so meaningful should be given greater consideration within the larger congregation. We feel connected, and we laugh and we cry as we rejoice and as we struggle. We love one another because we are known by one another. We are known by one another because we authentically engage with one another. “Authentic” is the key word here. It is messy and at times we hurt one another. Even in these circumstances, however, the relationship can be repaired because we have created a context in which we listen to one another. We have found a way to create this dynamic outside of the church. I wonder what must be done to create it within?